Through Love's Eyes Page 9

  “I decided when I first started modeling that I never wanted to pose nude. It just feels wrong and unnecessary. I’ve done spreads wearing only a bikini showcasing my fit, toned body, but they were in reputable fashion magazines. Not one with salacious intentions. Just the name of the magazine, Naturalé Mag, is disturbing. What a reader imagines my body looks like underneath a beautiful designer outfit is up to them, but displaying myself naked just feels desperate. Modeling is all I know. It’s all I am. What am I going to do if I’m not modeling?” She finished her wine in two gulps.

  “What about the magazine here now? Didn’t you tell me they want you for a bunch of parks photos?” Brit looked optimistic as she rubbed her arms.

  “Peter told me they canceled it and extended the time here by three days instead. There’s nothing out there for me.” She stood and began to pace.

  “Hey.” Brit stood, pulled her into her arms, and turned her toward the water. “Another beautiful event of Nature.”

  She leaned back into Brit’s embrace and watched the sun descend, inch by inch, below the horizon, as if sinking into the water to extinguish itself for the night. The sky flared with flames of orange and yellow light before dimming to a soft glow. “Gorgeous. Thank you.” She turned in Brit’s arms, framed her face with her hands, and kissed her. There might not be any answers, but for now, she could be content being right here.

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Brittany lay still and listened to the country song playing on her radio. She had two hours until she needed to report to the stables. She turned to her side and lost herself in the music for a few minutes enjoying the melody and lyrics. She liked starting her day with a song she could silently hum throughout the day when she felt stressed. She took a shower before dressing and brewing her coffee. Her worry over Erika’s future reminded her their time together would end in a few days.

  She hoped she’d turn down the offer for nude photos. Years ago, they only featured nude pictures in magazines, but these days, they’d be all over the internet forever. Maybe it was her own distaste for feeling exposed, vulnerable, which bothered her. She cringed when she thought of Erika uncovered and defenseless, displayed for all voyeurs, forever. She shook off the disturbing feelings and finished breakfast before she headed to ready the carriage for the day.

  She began wiping down the carriage as soon as she arrived. “Good morning, George,” she said.

  “Morning. Where you headed today?” he asked.

  “We’re going back to Mission Point. They want some shots of whatever’s blooming this month.” She finished her cleaning and polishing and tossed the used rags into a bin. “I’ll see you later.”

  “Have fun.” George waved as he walked away.

  Erika and the photographer were waiting outside when Brittany arrived with the carriage. “Good morning. Need any help boarding?” She asked because it was part of her job, but they’d been climbing in and out of the carriage easily since they arrived without her help.

  “No. We’re good,” the photographer answered.

  Brittany watched them settle into the seat and pressed the horses forward. “You may remember the information I gave you about Mission Point before, but today you’ll see the sculpted gardens up close. They’re quite impressive when everything is in bloom.” She concentrated on watching the horses plod along the route. Erika had smiled at her when their eyes met, but she remained silent on the trip.

  “There are some nice shops there, too.” Brittany realized she was talking to herself when she glanced at Erika, who was leaning back with her eyes closed. The photographer was fiddling with her camera, paying no attention to anything around her, and the rest of the crew gazed back and forth from one side to the other. She continued to steer the horses in silence until they neared their destination. “We’ll be arriving at the foot of the eighteen acres of grounds in a few minutes. Do you want me to park along here or go farther?”

  The photographer looked up from her camera and bent to inspect the area. “This is good. Thanks.” She jumped off the carriage and called to Erika to follow her.

  Erika blinked a couple of times and tipped her head side to side. “I guess I’m on.” She winked and stepped off the carriage to follow the camera. She looked awake and ready for anything.

  Brittany watched Erika work until they moved beyond her field of vision. She allowed her mind to wander to their time watching the sunset over the water. She’d relaxed in her arms, making her feel as if she was special.

  * * *

  Brittany parked the carriage and took care of the horses before heading home to change. Erika had whispered in her ear on their way back, “Pork Tenderloin and caramel cheesecake. Six p.m.” She wouldn’t have cared if they had crackers and cheese. She just wanted to spend time with her for however long she was available. She hurried along the path trying to think of something to take so she wouldn’t show up empty-handed. She chuckled. Erika was a rich supermodel staying at the Grand Hotel. What could she possibly need she couldn’t just order? As quickly as the thought materialized, she knew. She took a small detour along the way.

  She showered quickly and put on her newest pair of black jeans and a dark blue polo shirt. She’d been told it made her eyes stand out, so she guessed she looked nice in it. She took a light jacket in case they did more moon or sunset watching, and then carefully wrapped Erika’s special gift.

  Brittany knocked on Erika’s door at exactly six o’clock, and Erika answered on the first knock. She held the present behind her, looking forward to the surprise. “Hi there,” she said, unable to suppress her grin. Erika looked exquisite in a flowing black cotton blouse and white jeans.

  “Come on in.” She pulled her into the room, but before she could wrap her arms around her, Brittany handed her the gift.

  “Oh my, God. Pussy willows! Thank you, Brit. Where did you get them?” She retrieved a glass from the bar, filled it with water, and put the branches in it.

  “I grew them. It’s a small hobby of mine. I tend a few plants and trees, and I remember how much we liked them as kids. They were our ‘baby rabbit’s feet,’ remember?”

  “I do. What a thoughtful gift.” She stroked one of the fuzzy catkins slowly and smiled. “Many good luck charms on one branch.” She counted slowly, caressing each bud. “This one’s worth six days of good luck. Thank you.” Erika looked far away for a second, then turned and kissed her thoroughly. She pushed her against the door and pressed her body against hers. Erika ran her tongue over her upper lip and groaned when she pulled her closer. As quickly as Erika had started the kiss, she ended it. She leaned back but kept her hands on her hips. “Sorry. I couldn’t resist.”

  Brit grinned. “I don’t see any reason for you to apologize.” She stroked her face lightly. “You ready to eat?” Brit went to the food and filled both plates. She needed to settle herself after the unexpected kiss, and she was hungry. She held the plates out in front of her. “Shall we eat?”

  They sat in the parlor chairs to eat. “Thanks again for the great meal. I think I inhaled it tonight. I’m totally spoiled.”

  “I didn’t take my time with mine, either. I’m enjoying having you to share it. I travel the world and meet people everywhere I go, but mostly eat alone, or with Peter. But it’s usually a business meeting meal.” Sadness passed over Erika’s face as she spoke but disappeared quickly. She covered a yawn. “I’m sorry. I can’t believe how tired I am today.”

  Brittany took her hand and squeezed gently, wondering how often she had to suppress her feelings and how much energy it took. “Let’s finish our cheesecake.” She cut a piece for each of them and settled on the couch. Erika leaned against her, and she watched her eyes flutter closed. She rose and gently positioned Erika’s head on an armrest. She kissed her on the forehead before quietly leaving. Brittany took the long route home, needing to clear her head. She’d enjoyed Erika’s reaction to her gift of pussy willows. It solidified her belief her Amy, her friend, was still alive inside her
. She leaned against a tree to watch the late day sun sparkle off the water. She never tired of the view from anywhere on the island, and Erika acted like she enjoyed their times doing it together. But then, Erika had enjoyed views in France, Italy, New York, and other places in the world she’d never see. How long would it take before boredom settled in? How long before Erika would race to pack and head back to her high-speed life in the city? Brittany pushed off the tree and headed home, wondering why she was contemplating any of it.

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Erika woke to the soft sound of the closing door. She rolled off the couch and stretched before getting some water and going to examine Brit’s gift. She stroked the catkin on one of her pussy willow branches and allowed her thoughts to wander to the past. She never expected she’d see Brit again. Her guilt never left her throughout the years but neither did the memories of their kiss or their childhood friendship. She had to keep it all suppressed in order to function as Erika James, the adult, well put together, supermodel. She never allowed the knowledge of her bad behavior to be publicized, and it seemed a lifetime ago that it was so important to be admitted into the popular girl’s clique. She’d left high school and never looked back. Never returned for reunions. Twenty-three years later, was she still striving for acceptance? Now from the fashion world, not a teenage gang. A gang who’d derived self-worth from picking on others. Did she need to forgive herself, too, now that Brit, the victim, was back in her life offering forgiveness, and maybe more? She got the sense Brit had feelings for her, and she admitted to herself her growing feelings for her, but it couldn’t go anywhere. She’d be leaving for New York in a few days to try to continue her reign as a top fashion model. She’d make sure Peter found her something. She would find work, and her life would go on as it always had, full of parties and shoots and fashion. Why did the thought of it feel so hollow? Or lonely? She stretched out on the bed and fell asleep fully clothed.

  * * *

  Erika woke before her alarm, glad she wasn’t scheduled to wear the outfit she’d slept in. She tried to remember the last time she’d fallen asleep with her clothes on and couldn’t, but she knew she didn’t like it. Her feelings for Brit, and her uncertainty about her future, had her more unsettled than she wanted to admit. She took a shower and waited for Kathy to arrive. She didn’t know where they were headed for the day, but she planned to question Peter about the future and make sure she got answers. She began to pace while she waited. She checked her phone for the time and a message. Kathy had never been late before. She made herself a cup of coffee and waited another fifteen minutes before sending a text to Peter. The signal on her phone indicated it was weak but the text had gone through. She decided to wait another fifteen minutes before going to look for him. She ordered an omelet from room service and made another cup of coffee while she waited. The text came within five minutes.

  Sorry for the delay. Magazine feels it has what it needs. Looks like you’re off the hook for more photos here. I’ll get back to you with a timetable for leaving the island unless you want to make your own way back. P.

  Erika knew what it meant when people said they felt numb after getting bad news. She tossed her phone on the bed and plopped into a parlor chair. She managed to accept delivery of her breakfast, but she’d lost her appetite. She started at the soft knock at the door and watched it open slowly.

  “Erika?” Brit peeked around the open door and stepped into the room. She knelt on one knee in front of her. “Ben gave me the news this morning. Are you okay?”

  Erika tipped her head back and shook it. “I’m not sure. I’ve had photo shoots end earlier than planned, but never without letting me know ahead of time. I don’t know what to do. Why would they cancel a series of shoots without telling the featured model?” She forced back tears until she no longer could, and they spilled over her cheeks like a waterfall.

  “I know this sounds weak, but it’ll be okay.” Brit wrapped her in her arms and held her until she stopped crying.

  “I’m all right,” Erika sniffled. “I need to blow my nose.” She gently kissed Brit’s hand before she stood. “Help yourself to the omelet while it’s still warm.”

  She returned from the bathroom more composed. Brit had the omelet cut in half, a fork and cup of coffee on either side of the plate, and all of it set on the table between the parlor chairs. She couldn’t help but smile as she took her hand and led her to a seat.

  “Let’s share.” Brit sat in the other seat and handed her a fork.

  “Thank you. I’m feeling a little better. I suppose it’s not the end of the world. I’m worried that Peter won’t be able to find me more work. That stress on top of this sent me over the edge. I can’t figure out why the magazine didn’t give me a head’s up.” She took a bite of her half of the omelet.

  “So, they just canceled without warning?”

  “Yes. Like I said, it’s not unusual for a magazine to plan for more time than they need, or less sometimes, but the crew lets everyone know if they’ll finish early. I just wish they’d mentioned it to me, or to Peter.” She took another bite of food and sipped her coffee.

  “Peter didn’t even know?” Brit asked between bites.

  “I texted him this morning when my hair and makeup artist was late, and I thought maybe she was ill. He replied the magazine was done and didn’t need me anymore.” She was paraphrasing, but it was how it seemed. She was no longer needed.

  “Huh. Maybe he only found out when you did. I’m sorry it happened to you.” Brit brushed the back of her fingers on her cheek. “You’re a strong woman. You’ll get through this.”

  Erika appreciated Brit’s support and knew she was correct. She’d been in the business long enough to know that jobs came and went quickly. She just wished she knew what was coming next. She couldn’t allow herself to believe her only option was the nudie magazine.

  “I expect Peter to be here shortly, and I’ll find out what’s going on.”

  “I need to check in with Ben about my schedule. Will you be all right?” Brit finished her coffee and stood.

  “I’ll be fine. We’ll meet later and compare notes.” She smiled, realizing she believed her own words. She would be fine. For now, anyway. She poured herself a cup of coffee and sat to wait for Peter. She was finishing it when he arrived.

  “Come in, Peter.” Erika held the door open. She closed the door before continuing. “What’s the deal? I can’t believe the magazine didn’t give us any indication it was pulling out early.”

  Peter stood at the window for a moment before turning to answer. “I didn’t know either. This was a new magazine, so I’m thinking they didn’t have any experience with big name models. I’ll make sure they fulfill the payment part of the contract. You’ll get paid for your time.”

  “Thanks, Peter, but what comes next?” She sat on the couch.

  “I plan to head back to New York to try to line something up, but I wasn’t lying when I told you there were no offers out there. I’m hoping if I show up in person, I’ll find you something, but consider the Naturalé, Erika. They’re willing to pay big for you.”

  Erika sighed. “I’ll stay here until I hear from you, at least for a while. I know you’ll do your best.” She stood to see him to the door, hoping his best was good enough. If she went back to New York she might be able to do some networking. At least she could get in touch with a few models she knew. She hadn’t planned on staying on the island, but as soon as she said it, she knew it was the right choice. She couldn’t face her empty apartment, where the walls would close in on her with no work to go to.

  Chapter Twenty-three

  “Morning,” George called from inside the stables as Brittany walked by.

  “Good morning. How’re things?” Brittany stopped to find out if George knew anything about the magazine crew leaving.

  “It’s quiet here. I heard about the magazine quitting early. You okay with it?”

  “I’m a little disappointed. It was kind of fun on
ce I got used to it.” She didn’t need to share her fear of Erika leaving soon or their many kisses she’d miss.

  “I’ll be glad to have you back.” George grinned.

  “I’m going to check in with Ben now. I’ll see you later.”

  “Come in, Brittany,” Ben called. “Have a seat.” He spent a few seconds staring at the computer screen before turning his attention to her. “The magazine crew will be leaving the island this afternoon on the three o’clock ferry. I’d like you to take them to the dock. You can go back to your usual routine tomorrow.”

  “No problem. Did they tell you why they’re leaving early?”

  “Nope. All I know is they’ll be checking out of the hotel this afternoon.” He turned his attention back to his computer.

  Brittany walked back to her apartment, resisting the urge to check on Erika. She didn’t want to interrupt her meeting with Peter. She detoured to an area with better cell phone reception and sent her a text. She wanted her to know she could count on her for support, but she also wanted to convince her to stay on the island for a while longer. She stopped at the market to pick up a few supplies since she hadn’t shopped in a while, thanks to all the dinners with Erika. She picked out a few items she knew Erika liked and hoped she could talk her into coming over for dinner. She made herself a tuna sandwich and pulled out her vacuum. She might as well put her time off to good use.

  She checked her cell phone several times before she put it away, placed the potential dinner in the refrigerator, and went to dress for her trip to the ferry. She hoped against hope that Erika wouldn’t be one of the ones leaving. Surely she’d have said something if she was going, right? Not that she really owed Brittany anything, but after the closeness they’d developed, she thought that maybe… She sighed and shook her head. There was only one way to find out.